This is it: the last day of the year 2019 and of the decade. What a year/ decade it has been. As this year and decade are coming to a close, I thought about the kind of content I could bring to you in the last article of the year. And I fell strongly to share one of my last meditations that correlate with one of the most important lessons I learned this year. My meditation is found in Psalm 46: 10 which says :
"Be still and know that I am God".
I have lately gotten into the habit of looking up particular verses or stories in different Bible versions. This time, instead of going to my usual ones, I went to the Complete Jewish Bible and interestingly enough Psalm 46:10 in that version read :
"Desist and learn that I am God"
I went ahead and looked up synonyms of desist and the one synonym that caught my attention was relinquish which means to give up, let go. So a good/close enough paraphrase to that verse would be "let go and learn that I am God". This year and this whole decade I have wrestled with my need to control everything as God brought me into places that challenged me to let go. And in these times and through this verse, I have understood (quite painfully) that as long as we desire to control and manipulate things we cannot know truly who God is and what He is capable of as every situation we go through reveals a different attribute of God.
I want to believe that this ability to know God under a new light each and every time we walk through different situations and seasons in life is the reason why God did not add anything else after saying "I am Who I am" (Exo 3:14). To add an adjective or a noun after this statement would be to put God in a box and limit Him when according to Paul we know that He is the one "who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all we can ask or think, according to the power that works in us" (Eph 3:20-21). In order for God to be God, He has to be released from our need to be in control of everything and that need to be in control includes our predictability/ expectation for Him to move a certain way. God asks us to relinquish control so we can learn through our walk with Him and the things we go through who He is to us.
I also want to believe that it is for that same purpose -- for us to know Him for who He is to us -- that in Matthew 16:13, Jesus asks the disciples: "What are people saying about who the son of man is?" only to ask a little further "But you, who do you say that I am ?"
It was important at this point because at this point Jesus had already put his disciples in situations where they had no other choice but to relinquish control to God (Jesus). Letting go and acknowledging they were at their wits end was an invitation for God to step in and be just that: God. It was an opportunity for them to know the I am Who I am under different nuances. One minute He stepped in as a provider by feeding five thousand people with five loaves of bread and two fishes; the next minute He is commanding wind and storm to quiet down affirming his authority as the creator of all things. In between those two, He reveals himself as the one who can bring dead situations and people back to life and a healer that came thru for a woman who had an issue of blood for twelve years.
In my valley season, I have learned to shift my perspective slowly from "why me?" to asking myself "what is the attribute of God or the lesson I am supposed to see here?" This is important because having this posture is when and where you learn about yourself but also about God day after day, every step of the way. To relinquish for me this year / decade looked a lot like leaning more on God and less on myself to make things happen; it looked like "learning God" for myself, being on my own journey, rather than through the lenses of my disappointments, church hurt and let downs. And what I discovered is that God is faithful, loving, caring, reliable and forgiving rather than being God who will beat me around with a stick if I mess up or fall short of His expectations of me.
Beloved, walking in the valley is hard but there is something about God that you need to learn and it might require for your to relinquish control to Him. And it might go a little further than that: perhaps it might be letting go of the hurt you went through or the grudge you are holding onto so fiercely and tightly; or perhaps it is letting go of that "thing" that God has been tugging at your heart for a while now to let go of. To relinquish is to give God clearance to be who and what we need Him to be at the moment He meets you in our story.
Friend, as you let go and allow God to be who and what you need Him to be in this new year and decade, I pray that He rushes into the space you have made for Him with goodness, love, healing, deliverance, peace and comfort. I pray you see Him, find out and learn with an open heart who He is to you and for you.
As I write those last words and last article of 2019, allow me to formulate my wishes for you under the form of this passage from Numbers 6:24
"[May] The Lord bless you and keep you
Make His face shine on you and be gracious to you
[May] The Lord turn His face towards you and give you peace"
And to add to that in my very own words:
May the Lord give you peace, love, comfort, faith
May He grant you the confidence and strength to be who He has called you to be and carry your mission with grace and poise.
May you be a light and may you shine bright
And as you shine, may the people around you see in you the God who has called you to do all those things
May you be bold in the pursuit of the things that set your soul on fire and may the anointing on your life changes circumstances around you and break off generational curses.
May you wear your crown with holy confidence and pride.
May you always remember who you are and whose you are.
May you remember that nothing is too big or impossible for your God.
May you remember that you "can do anything through God who strengthens you"
And in the days where you will feel like its too hard, in the days where you will feel like giving up, may you remember that you were made for such a time as this, for the times you are walking through in life.
You got this, and God got you friend.
Happy New Year and until next time,