Don't Stay Stuck When They Leave

“ Life will not stop just because Justin left” ~ Mary Jane Paul,

Being Mary Jane, season 4 episode 20

This has probably been one of the realest episode and season of Being Mary Jane. I have watched that woman grow, struggle, go from heartbreak to heartbreak to finally understand one of the most important lessons in life: you cannot make choices based on your sense of insecurity or your fear of people leaving you. You make choices that you feel are right for you. She stood for herself and dared to go down a route she had never been before. She chose to support her friend and pursue what she wanted even if it meant that she had to do it alone because sometimes you just have to let things/ people go in order to get where you are mean to be. But how many of us crumble and stay stuck when people leave our life because of the choices and values we decide to hold onto? Worst! How many of us hold on to people/things by fear thus compromising our dreams, our values, our future, selling ourselves short in the process?

When Lot and his family left Sodom and Gomorra, Lot’s wife looked behind her and was turned into a statue of salt but Lot did not look behind. He did not stop. He did not stay stuck: he had to keep moving because there was a place he had to go and until he got there he could not stop. And there is no greater loss than the loss of a spouse! But he simply couldn’t risk looking back and stay stuck because it wasn’t worth it. Did he feel sad? Probably. Did he mourn the loss of his wife? It is safe to assume that. But did he let that stop him from going where God had told him to go? No. He kept walking until he got to a safe place where he could look back without risking to be stuck there.
Some people have to leave you and exit your life in order for you to go where you are supposed to go. They have to because otherwise they will slow you down, hinder you in your walk and you might never get to where God has planned for you to be at. And you cannot crumble every time somebody leaves. You cannot fall apart every time someone walks away from your life! The road is still long and you cannot afford to waste time that you do not have.

For serious 😩😂

In Matthew 13:36 which relates the events preceding the crucifixion of Jesus, Peter asked Jesus where He was going and to that Jesus responded:

“Where I am going you cannot follow me now, but you will follow afterward.”

Jesus knew that where He was going not everybody could accompany him. He knew! that in order for the Divine plan of God to take place He had to go through what He went through alone! And sometimes we have those really close friends that have been there since day one and who swear they will always have our back no matter what just like Peter! And they demonstrate a willingness to just accompany us and be there just like Peter but let’s looks at what happens in the following verses (Matthew 13 37 to 38):

“Peter said to him, “Lord, why can I not follow you now? I will lay down my life for you.” Jesus answered, “Will you lay down your life for me? Truly, truly, I say to you, the rooster will not crow till you have denied me three times.”

Now here's the breaking news: the people walking the walk with you may mean well and speak from a place of genuine feelings and emotions but guess what? Just like Peter they might deny you. Not because they don’t love you, not because they weren’t genuine (but it’s a possibility) but because it is God’s divine set up to get you where you have to go, to propel you into your divine destiny and to allow you to go from the grave to the glory. And if it is part of God's plan for your life there is nothing you can do to keep them. Nothing.  Don’t you think Jesus was bummed out? Crushed and sad? Of course He was! But He knew already that all of this was for a higher purpose! He knew looong before those events that “all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” Rom 8:28. So He knew that eventually He would be alright. He didn’t stay into his feelings or spent days asking himself “why are people leaving me? 😭😭😭” He knew He had to go somewhere and people had to get out of the way for Him to get there in a timely manner.

I want to encourage someone today to keep walking. The road can seem long and lonely, and honestly it sucks when people leave your life but some people simply cannot follow you where you are going. Please overstand that them leaving serves a higher purpose for your life, that will be revealed by God in due time. And it might not make sense now. You might be hurting like hell right now but just know that this too shall pass and all things (all of them) will work together for your good, according to God’s purpose for your life.


Until next time,
xo