5 Things You Learn From Being Raised By A Strong Mother

Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Why… hello there! I know… I know… I have been missing in action lately and nothing comes close to the guilt of leaving you guys on the tip of your toes, waiting for a new article and then post nothing. I am sorry if I have hurt your feelings and I will [try] work hard to build back the trust. The thing is… I hate not having something of substance to share. I feel the same way Adele did when she was recording 21 and she thought she didn’t have THAT song... You know… The one she could connect to people through, the one that make you feel like you got punched in the gut and have a full blown meltdown in the middle of your Wholefood, in the icecram/dairy aisle. I am all about emotions and as a blogger, I am very much like Adele in a sense that I need to write something my audience can identify with. And unless I can do that, I do not have the courage to show up on my platform. I am not the platonic kind. Sorry… phew… okay I feel better. We’re cool now… so.. now that I got that out of the way, let’s dive into the topic of the day: Parenthood from a child perspective. Hopefully there will be more upcoming articles (Hopefully) about that topic which I find quite interesting.

Yeah I know... I was a bit on the heavy side circa 1990s'

As children, we most of the time find our parents annoying when we are not actually trying to get over the embarrassment we think they are for us. We are so used to this train of thoughts that we undervalue the things they have brought into our lives and the values they have passed onto us; values that are being acclaimed because of how awesome and respectable adults they have made us. So today I want to talk about what it was like for me to be raised by a strong mother and what a huge difference it has made into my life. Just FYI, my parents are [very happily] still married [celebrated their 30 yrs anniversary this year] but for the purpose of this article, I am focusing primarily on what I have learned being raised by a strong mother. So without further due, here are the five most important lessons you learn [from my perspective] from being raised by a strong mother.

1-      You don’t take shit from anybody
As a strong woman, my mom has never been the kind of woman to let people walk all over her. She wouldn’t take shit from anybody and if you did something wrong, she would call you on your shit at the very moment. Being a young woman with brain and moxie is difficult but being in a male dominated field is even more difficult. And sometimes people are not very nice, whether it is in the workplace or in real life. Being able to call people on their bs and not take trash being thrown at me has definitely given me the ability to build my confidence and distinguish myself from the crowd. And I am forever grateful for that. Thank you mama ❤

2-      You learn what unconditional love is
Nothing was never too much for my mother: she always gave her best and did her best, giving to each one of her child pieces of herself for us to be whole. And She has instilled that sense of sacrifice in me. It is true that I sometimes come as closed off, unexpressive emotionally but just because I don’t express my love doesn’t mean I don’t feel it. I feel it deeply and for the people I love and care about, I would do anything; Anything to make them happy, to ensure that they know they are being loved by pouring my love and t happiness into their lives. I give without expecting anything because by watching my mother do it for me, I have understood that it’s what you do when you love people: you give without expecting anything in return.

3-      You have the capacity / potential to do anything you put your mind to
My mother is my superhero. She could handle any situation and up to this day it still blows my mind. If my mother is onto something I can’t handle on my own, I am 99.9% convinced it’s going to be solved. And I have grown up to be that woman too. Being raised by a strong mother, I have learned to not wait around for somebody to do something for me or save me: I get sh*t done myself and make myself the heroine of my story. I have also learned that the only limit to being the best version of myself and achieve great things in life is my own mind/ beliefs. Why? Because I have seen my mother do it all and big and it made me understand that I have all I need within me to do the same thing.  All I have to do is believe in myself,  tap into those unexploited resources within me to make great things happen.

4-      You can be strong and soft
There is no contradiction here. My mother is a strong woman but she has a soft side. We are so used to that mindset of picking  one or the other that at some point I was confused too. Growing up strong I had that misconception that being soft was a weakness even though, socially, it is more acceptable for a woman to be soft than for a man. But looking up to my mother, I finally got comfortable with the idea that I didn’t have to act like (or be) Superwoman all the time and be strong 24/7. I got comfortable with the idea that I was entitled to feel any type of way I wanted and that it was okay to be in touch with my feminine side, it was okay to be soft (sometimes).

5-      You learn to have faith
In God first and in yourself, trusting that no matter how bad things seem to be, it will all work out in the end and everything will be fine.

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