One thing that I know and that is mostly true about women is
that we all have THAT checklist of the qualities and the expectation we would
like to find in a man. This list has been existing for centuries and is THE
reference in term of what the charming prince should look like. Most guys don’t
take it seriously but WE, women, consider it a serious matter as our emotional well-being
depends on it. it is updated every year and the length varies from one woman to
another: some lengthen it every year some other shorten it. Again it depends on
your inspiration and on what you are looking for in guy. The content is also a
mix of everything going from the most common “criteria” such as tall, light skinned,
funny, caring, affectionate, handsome to some really unusual requirement
(dimples, quiet, blue eyes, white and well aligned teeth… that one I admit is
kinda weird but hey only a woman knows what can make her happy!).
Every woman decides what inspires her and most importantly what the charming prince, the man of her dream should look like. But that is the problem : it is a dream, an idealization of what every man we meet should look like. That ideal we have of the man that we pray come into our lives, sweep us off our feet and make us happy ever after is most of the time the reason why we are not able to commit to a relationship. We are too busy looking for the perfect man and sometimes we miss the opportunities that life offers us to be happy. Now don’t get me wrong: I am not saying the man of your dream does not exist. I know plenty of women, and some of my friends who have found exactly what they were hoping for (well close enough). What I am saying is that the one that is wrong according to your checklist could turn out to be the one who is exactly right for your heart. He could be the one who will know how to love you, how to take care of you, how to bring out the best in you in the most perfect ways.
For centuries the society we live in has been selling us
that ideal: you look for the right guy and one day! Baaaam! He just shows up, he
is everything you have ever looked for, he sweeps you off your feet, wants you
to be his significant other, hopefully one day he proposes to you, you get the
ring, the white dress, the perfect wedding and you live happily ever after.
But in true life it is not what happens, in true life that one guys doesn’t score a 100 on your checklist, he probably won’t have ½ of what you have on your checklist. But somewhere at the end of the day, you will fall for him, for what you didn’t have on your list that he brought with him into your life and into your heart.
But in true life it is not what happens, in true life that one guys doesn’t score a 100 on your checklist, he probably won’t have ½ of what you have on your checklist. But somewhere at the end of the day, you will fall for him, for what you didn’t have on your list that he brought with him into your life and into your heart.
I have loved three works of art so far that have been in
phase with the reality of falling in love with someone. One was a book (the Cinderella deal) and the two others
were movies (the wedding date and my fake fiancée). They truthfully exhibit
what happens in real life: taking down clichés by about perfect match and
demonstrating how the one we think is the wrong person (either because he has
nothing from our checklist or because he has absolutely nothing in common with
us) can turn out to be the perfect match.
So women as good as it is to have a checklist so that you
can keep track of what you need for your happiness you might as well want to
lift your eyes from it once in a while. Just once in a while for the sake of it
and also because you never know what the man that will sweep you off your feet
will look like.
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